Words of Wisdom

Discussion in 'Jokes' started by Jorawsky, Jan 19, 2008.

  1. Jorawsky

    Jorawsky Member

    I ran across this and thought that some might find it enjoyable reading.
    (my apologies if it has been previously posted !)

    Words of wisdom from an old Biker

    1. Gray-haired bikers don't get that way from pure luck.
    2. The only good view of a thunderstorm is in your rearview mirror.
    3. Only Bikers understand why dogs love to stick their heads out car windows.
    4. Pie and Coffee are as important as gasoline.
    5. Never do less than Forty miles before breakfast.
    6. Young riders pick a destination and go...Old riders pick a direction and go.
    7. Winter is Natures way of telling you to polish.
    8. The best alarm clock is sunshine on Chrome.
    9. Don't argue with an 18-wheeler
    10. When you're riding lead....don' t spit.
    11. Midnight bugs taste best.
    12. Saddlebags can never hold everything you want, but they can hold everything you need.
    13. NEVER argue with a woman holding a torque wrench.
    14. Never try to race an old Geezer, he may have one more gear than you.
    15. Home is where your bike sits still long enough to leave a few drops of oil on the ground.
    16. You'll get farther down the road if you learn to use more than two fingers on the front brake.
    17. Routine maintenance should never be neglected.
    18. It takes more love to share the saddle than it does to share the bed.
    19. Never be afraid to slow down.
    20. Bikes don't leak oil, they mark their territory.
    21. Never ask a biker for directions if you're in a hurry to get there.
    22. Don't ride so late into the night that you sleep through the sunrise.
    23. Sometimes it takes a whole tankful of gas before you can think straight.
    24. Riding faster than everyone else only guarantees you'll ride alone.
    25. Never hesitate to ride past the last street light at the edge of town.
    26. Never mistake Horsepower for staying power.
    27. A good rider has balance, judgment and good timing. So does a good lover.
    28. A cold hamburger can be reheated quite nicely by strapping it to an exhaust pipe and riding forty miles.
    29. If you don't ride in the rain-you don't ride.
    30. A bike on the road is worth 2 in the shop.
    31. Respect the person who has seen the Dark side of motorcycling and lived.
    32. A good wrench will let you watch without charging you for it.
    33. Sometimes the fastest way to get there is to stop for the night.
    34. Always back your scoot into the curb-and sit where you can see it.
    35. Work to Ride-Ride to Work.
    36. Whatever it is, it's better in the wind.
    37. Two lane blacktop isn't a highway-it's an attitude.
    38. When you look down the road, it seems to never end-but you better believe it does.
    39. A motorcycle can't sing on the streets of a city.
    40. Keep your bike in good repair: Motorcycle boots are NOT comfortable for walking.
    41. People are like Motorcycles: each is customized a bit differently.
    42. If the bike isn't braking properly, you don't start by rebuilding the engine.
    43. Remember to pay as much attention to your partner as you do your carburetor.
    44. Sometimes the best communication happens when you're on separate
    45. Well-trained reflexes are quicker than luck.
    46. Good coffee should be indistinguishable from 50 weight motor oil. (Hey does this mean Grif was right about something for once? )
    47. Learn to do counterintuitive things that may someday save your butt.
    48. The twisties-not the super slabs-separate the bikers from the squids.
    49. If you really want to know what's going on, watch what's happening at least 5 cars ahead.
    50. Don't make a reputation you'll have to live down or run away from later.
    51. If the person in the next lane
    at the stoplight rolls up the window and locks the door, support their view of life by snarling at them.
    52. A friend is someone who'll get out of bed at 2am to drive his pickup to the middle of nowhere to get you when you're broken down.
    53. If she changes her oil more than she changes her mind-follow her.
    54. Catchin' a June bug (or yellow jacket in your goggles or honeybee down your shirt) at 70 mph can double your vocabulary.
    55. There's something ugly about a NEW bike on a trailer.
    56. Hunger can make even road kill taste good.
    57. Sleep with one arm thru the spokes and keep your pants on.
    58. Practice wrenching on your own bike.
    59. Everyone crashes. Some get back on. Some don't. Some can't.
    60. Beware the biker who says the bike never breaks down.
    61. Some bikes run on 99-octane ego.
    62. Owning 2 bikes is useful because at least one can be raided for parts at any given time.
    63. You'll know she loves you if she offers to let you ride her bike. Don't do it and she'll
    love you even more.
    64. Never be ashamed to unlearn an old habit.
    65. Maintenance is as much art as it is science.
    66. A good long ride can clear your mind, restore your faith, and use up a lot of gasoline.
    67. If the countryside seems boring, stop, get off your bike, and go sit in the ditch long enough to appreciate what was here before the asphalt came.
    68. If you can't get it goin' with bungee cords and electricians tape-it's serious.
    69. If you ride like there's no tomorrow- there won't
    70. If you want to complain about the pace being set by the road captain, you better be prepared to lead the group yourself.
    71. There are drunk bikers. There are old bikers. There are NO old, drunk bikers.
    72. Thin leather looks good in the bar, but it won't save you from "road rash" if you go down.
    73. The best modifications cannot be seen from the outside.
    74. Always replace the cheapest parts first.
    75. You can forget what you do for a living when your knees are in the

    Roy Jorawsky
  2. HarleyHarry

    HarleyHarry Banned

    Whow, that's a lot of wisdom there.
    Welcome to the gang Roy

    07ROADKING Active Member

    i like 57 sound like me:unsure
  4. glider

    glider Veteran Member

    Lots of good points there.:s
  5. roaddawg4life

    roaddawg4life Member

    that is very true are you have you seen the bikers code ?
    its pretty cool to .Author: Unknown
    What Every Biker Should Know
    The two-wheeled code of the west
    It used to be that all bikers shared a common bond, an unspoken code of ethics and behavior that transcended words and was built on actions. There was never a bible written on this Biker's Code of the West and there was no need for such to me. But the times are a-changin' and there seems to be a lot of new riders out there. These days the riders you see blastin' down the tarmac are just as likely to be clad in shorts and sneakers as jeans and engineer boots. And the roughest, toughest-looking biker you pull up next to could be your doctor or lawyer and may be wearin' a Rolex watch under his leathers. There's nothing wrong with that, so long as these new riders learn the Code of the West just as we old-timers did.
    Being a biker used to be about using your creativity to take a basket case old hawg and using only grit and ingenuity, turning it into a one of a kind eye dazzler, then risking your life on the asphalt on a bike you made yourself out of pride. Bikers wore leather and grease because they knew cagers would just as soon run them down as look at them, so they had to be intimidating. We were a breed unto ourselves with no union, no support group, and in many cases, no family (they threw us out). We had to make it in the world of our own, against all rules, against mainstream society, and against all odds. You know, we survived and prospered because of the Biker Code of the West and we never took[censored] from anybody. As an old scooter tramp named Jug once said, "It's every tramp's job to school the young. How else are they gonna know a Panhead from a bed pan?" With that in mind, we bring you a primer on the basic two-wheeled Code of the West. Take heed, brothers and sisters, for our Code is a hallowed one filled with honor and loyalty, the likes of which have not been since the days of knighthood.
    The Biker Commandments
    Don't take any[censored]. Be kind to woman, children and animals, but don't take any [censored]. This is an essential part of being a biker. It has to do with respect and honor. Anyone can be a brash, quick- tempered lout. Be cool, stand tall and backup what you say with action.
    Never lie, cheat or steal. Another way of saying this is to always tell the truth. Bikers are always the greasy bad guys in the movies, but every real biker knows that his word is his bond. Your word is all you have in life that is truly yours. Guard it carefully and be about something noble, for you are a true knight of the road.
    Don't snitch. If you see a wrong, fight it yourself. If you are about anything, you'll take care of problems yourself and never feel the need to snitch someone off. Snitches are the lowest life forms on earth, right up there with biker thieves. This rule goes hand in hand with the next one.
    Don't Snivel. Absolutely no one likes or respects a sniveler. Another way to say this is hold your mud. Still another way to think of it is, "Don't sweat the small stuff." Most of life's little inconveniences work themselves out whether you snivel or not. Keep your chin up, dammit! You're a biker, not some lowly mollusk.
    Never say die and never give up. Whether it's in a fight, a debate, or a business deal, no matter how bad it gets, a biker never gives up. That's why you see a lot of wealthy bikers these days, 'cause they don't know how to quit in any element of their lives. In the biker world of rugged individualists, only the strong survive.
    Help others. When a brother or sister is broken down by the side of the road, stop and help them. Even moral support, if that is all you can give, is better than riding on by. Remember life is about the journey, the ride, not getting there. You already are there. And don't just help bikers, show the world that we are better than our image portrays us. Courtesy costs you nothing and gives you everything.
    Stick to your guns. Do what you say you'll do, be there when you say you will. This is called integrity. This also goes back to standing for something. Like the song says, "You've got to stand for something or you'll fall for anything."
    Life is not a drill. Yeah, this ain't no dress rehearsal. This is life-go out and take big bites of it. You've got no time to lose and bikers don't stand around waiting for the party to come to them. You only go around once. Tomorrow you could be road kill, thanks to a chain smoker asleep at the wheel of his Caddy. Live life now, make the most of each moment. This is not a drill.
    All right, now let's review. You are a biker, a modern-day knight of the road. Protect the weak, walk tall and stand proud. Your word is your bond. Stick to your guns. Don't take any [censored]. Life is not a drill. Now go forth and ride. When in doubt, ride. That's what we do...ride. If you want to ride around in a Day-Glo Hawaiian shirt and sandals, go for it, but if you intend to look like a goof, at least don't act like a goof. These commandments are just a few of the broad strokes, there is a lot more to being a biker than buying a bike. If you just buy a bike, you are a motorcyclist. Being a biker is a way of life, a proud way of life we hold in high regard and with a burning passion for the open highway and for life