Where's the Oil ??

Discussion in 'Jokes' started by Weeg, Mar 2, 2011.

  1. Weeg

    Weeg Member

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    A lot of folks can't understand how we came to have an oil shortage here in our country.

    Well, there's a very simple answer.

    Nobody bothered to check the oil. We just didn't know we were getting low.
    The reason for that is purely geographical.

    Our Oil is located in Alaska, California, Coastal Florida, Coastal Louisiana, Coastal Alabama, Coastal Mississippi, North Dakota, Wyoming, Colorado, Kansas,
    Oklahoma, Pennsylvania, and Texas.

    Our dipsticks are located in DC

    Any Questions? NO? Didn't think So.
     
  2. Duane53

    Duane53 Active Member

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    Boy how true that is.
     
  3. mat 60

    mat 60 Senior Member

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    How can we fix this?
     
  4. mydeluxe

    mydeluxe Member

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    Once upon a time the government had a vast scrap yard in the middle
    of a desert. Congress said, "Someone may steal from it at night." So they
    created a night watchman position and hired a person for the job.

    Then Congress said, "How does the watchman do his job without
    instruction?" So they created a planning department and hired two people,
    one person to write the instructions, and one person to do time studies.

    Then Congress said, "How will we know the night watchman is doing
    the tasks correctly?" So they created a Quality Control department and
    hired
    two people. One to do the studies and one to write the reports.

    Then Congress said, "How are these people going to get paid?" So
    They created two positions: a time keeper and a payroll officer, then
    hired two people.

    Then Congress said, "Who will be accountable for all of these
    people?"

    So they created an administrative section and hired three people, an
    Administrative Officer, Assistant Administrative Officer, and a Legal
    Secretary.

    Then Congress said, "We have had this command in operation for one
    Year and we are $918,000 over budget, we must cutback." So they laid off
    the night watchman.

    NOW slowly, let that sink in.

    Quietly, we go like sheep to slaughter.

    Does anybody remember the reason given for the establishment of the
    DEPARTMENT OF ENERGY..... during the Carter Administration?

    Anybody?

    No?

    Ready??

    It was very simple..and at the time, everybody thought it very appropriate. The Department of Energy was instituted on 8/04/1977, TO LESSEN OUR DEPENDENCE ON FOREIGN OIL.

    AND NOW IT'S 2011 -- 33 YEARS LATER -- AND THE BUDGET FOR THIS "NECESSARY" DEPARTMENT IS AT $24.2 BILLION A YEAR. IT HAS 16,000 FEDERAL EMPLOYEES AND APPROXIMATELY 100,000 CONTRACT EMPLOYEES; AND LOOK AT THE JOB IT HAS DONE! THIS IS WHERE YOU SLAP YOUR FOREHEAD AND SAY, "WHAT WERE THEY THINKING?"

    NOW, WE HAVE TURNED THE BANKING SYSTEM, HEALTH CARE, AND THE AUTO
    INDUSTRY OVER TO THE SAME GOVERNMENT?

    Hello!! Anybody Home?
     
  5. drbillk

    drbillk Banned

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    +1 This could not be more true. Painful, shameful... but true.
     
  6. workindog

    workindog New Member

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    yeah no doubt, seems the dips are just too weak or short sighted, they seem to get bent along the way,, pity that,, or we'ld all be eatin that rainbow stew..